Children are spontaneous and are always ready to try the risk factor. But when it comes to making friends, not all of our little ones are ready to jump into the friendship bandwagon. And it’s especially true for our autistic friends.
If you are a parent of an autistic child, you probably already know how difficult it is for them to read social gestures, postures, expressions, and norms. Autistic children are not built to fit in easily in society, for them it is tough to interact with the outside world. As a mother, it is quite uneasy to see your child being unable to make friends.
How to help autistic kids make friends
In your heart, you want them to have friends and have that kind of connection. Don’t get disheartened though, it is not like they will never be able to make friends and keep friendships. This post will give you some tips that will give you an idea of how to help autistic kids make friends.
Explain friends
This is quite simple; you need to talk with your child about friends. And you need to be specific rather than talk abstract. This will help him differentiate between friends and bullies. You can have a conversation which starts with, “friends are people who say nice words to you or who treat you nicely”.
Be specific about a friend’s role so that they are able to understand the term better.
Also, when discussing friends, talk to them about stranger danger.
Read to your child
Reading to a child whether he is autistic or not is a great way to; increase their vocabulary, discuss emotions of other characters and build a bond. One on one reading unlike in a school helps a lot and gives an opportunity to discuss different situations and gives the child the chance to ask questions.
Provide opportunities
You may have experienced a lot of meltdowns and tantrums in public which is why you fear going out. But this won’t help and only decrease the chances of your child making friends.
It’s better to plan out a day ahead with your child and his friend and incorporate activities of both their choices. This will teach him the social compromise required to build up a friendship. Before meeting up, talk to him about what’s going to happen. It helps them prepare in advance and will help prevent any meltdowns.
And if meltdowns are your biggest fear, I suggest you check this post on Emotional Regulation For Kids With Autism.
Your child’s interests
To build up a friendship it is important to have common interests. Try to find a club or a class of your kid’s interest and sign him up for it. Also, be sure it is for the same age group as your child. This will help a lot; having a common interest with a kid of your size, not only makes it fun but increase the chances of initiating conversations.
Don’t expect too much
It is not a good idea to lay too many expectations on your child. If he is comfortable with one or two friends, then let it be like that. Try not to force him to make more friends just because you find it appealing.
You may have friends who like to play chess together while others like to vacation with theirs, so be open to what your child is at ease with. Just because you were very social does not mean that your kids need to be like that. It is important for him to stay happy and that is what friendships are for, aren’t they?
Difference in friendships
Some parents just for the sake of their ease want their kids to be friends with their friends’ kids. Whether your kid is autistic or not, this does not always work well. You need to respect your kid’s choices and let them choose their own friends.
Be patient
You need to be patient, none of this happens in a jiffy. You will have your moments, good and bad ones. You need to be consistent and help your child in various ways at home as well. Try to register yourself in programs for autism and learn more.
I hope this article will help you to find out ‘how to help autistic child to make friends. If you notice your child is different and you are unable to cope with it and these strategies aren’t also helping, I would love to help you determine your child’s individual needs. Please reach out to set up a free consultation. We are here to support you as you help your child blossom!
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If you enjoyed reading How to help autistic kids make friends, you might also enjoy reading:
Self- assessment: Is It Speech Delay or Autism
Emotional Regulation for Kids With Autism
